MENTORING WITH A BROKEN HEART

Ahmaud Arbery. Breonna Taylor. George Floyd. These are just three names and three lives from another country where their story has ended in a veil of evil and injustice that has not just impacted me, but millions of people across the globe.  As racial prejudice and weaponised whiteness has been digitised and publicised on a global scale, it’s important to recognise that racism is not a new thing - but it is being filmed. ​​​
I have cried over each story as thousands of hearts break and mourn for both loss and injustice. It’s difficult to not be swallowed by the frustration and the emotions that roll over from events like these. And it’s important to remember that similar injustices take place in my own city. 

As a white man, I will never fully grasp the pain or the trauma that my coworkers, boss, course mates, friends, mentees or partner experiences every time the news shows another black individual that is yet again a victim of white prejudice. And so the challenge remains; how, then, can I - a white man who is still understanding and learning about the privilege that my skin colour dictates - mentor the young people of London with a broken heart? When the issue of racism is so big, so convoluted, so marred in pain and blood, how can I use my whiteness to lift up others?

Something that Elaine exemplifies, is compassion. I’m not perfect, I am still learning - but each time I’m on the phone with Elaine, I’m met with a genuine compassion, even when she may be hurting herself. Compassion runs through the veins of The Mentoring Lab, and it’s through the lens of empathy that I am able to recognise the trauma that young people suffer when news and events such as the recent abominable acts that have gone viral.

If you haven’t gathered yet, I can get emotional. But I’ve learnt that emotions and broken hearts don’t hinder the capacity to mentor - rather they inform the need for it. In other words, I believe that mentoring from a place of broken heartedness, from a place of compassion, from a place of passion is what fuels and drives the practice of mentoring. I believe that the key to see these racial injustices eradicated is found in who we raise, and how we raise them. The answer is in us, the young people we serve, and the vision of change that we will bring together. A broken heart informs us of the world that we want to see - a world we need to see.

As fire ignites our bones, as compassion runs through our veins, as our expertise weaves into the stories of the rising generations, I believe that together we are writing a chapter in history that will be so profound and monumental that no one will see it coming.
No one, but the mentors with a broken heart.

A unique perspective on Loco Parentis in schools

In an urban setting with a cocktail mix of cultures, religions, and economic backgrounds, we discuss how the fundamentals of mentoring can help you to teach and safeguard another person's child.

 

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How to successfully mentor mentoring-resistant youth

For young people with long-term, multiple professional adults supporting them, or negative past experiences of mentoring, initiating and sustaining the mentoring relationship can be challenging. In this post Specialist Youth Mentor and Trainer, Elaine Thomas explains here mentoring strategy coined 'The Dance'.

In mentoring we build relationships with young people that resemble the ‘dance’ Teresa May engaged in on her visit to Africa in 2018.

This dance begins at the initiation of the relationship and ends once our intent, ground rules, and testing stages of the relationship have been established.

The dance is a fantastic way to develop strong, sustainable, and productive teacher-student relationships. 

 

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Youth culture as a solution to youth violence

Youth culture, as we experience it today is one of if not the most powerful subculture of society we’ve ever seen. It has changed the way we do everything. There is however one area that remains hindered by old age societal norms; our discourse with young people about their experiences, expectations, values, solutions and recommendations.   

 

The solution is youth culture; as far-fetched and utopian as it may seem. 

 

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NO PRESSURE

My name is Scott and I am one of the expert youth mentors at The Mentoring Lab.

​We have just finished our two week long GAMETIME online programme – and it was amazing! I had the privilege to run the public speaking workshop, which if I’m honest – was a little nerve wracking! When I did the video promotion for it, I had to do at least 50 takes in different rooms in my house before I was happy with it. Originally, the public speaking workshops were going to be for just the first week. Myself and Hara, one of our incredible volunteers, weren’t exactly sure what to expect, especially for our first time at doing an online workshop – but we were confident and ready to have fun!

Our worries evaporated as soon as the first young person joined the call – it was awesome! It was great to connect with young people from across London, and it was an incredible opportunity to provide some fun and inspiration in the middle of what is quite a dark and uncertain time.

A challenge for the young people that ran throughout the session was to write a seven-minute speech to change the world – no pressure! But each and every young person came up with profound topics, smashing my expectations. The topics ranged from mutual respect, to discrimination, to even the environment. I came away from the sessions inspired by the vision of the young people, and their eagerness to not just learn, but to change the world.

After talking with some of the team, we extended the public speaking workshops for the next week – which wasn’t something I was expecting! It was great that the young people were engaging, and there was a buzz about the workshops on social media, but that wasn’t the big thing. The big thing was found in the feedback. The young people explained that they felt less anxious about their current situation, they were more prepared for when they may speak in public and more confident in themselves.

We recorded the speeches in the final session, and one of the young people turned her speech into a rap – which blew me away! It was a raw, powerful message about discrimination, and that was the ‘lightbulb’ moment for me. I wasn’t just putting on a workshop for young people, but I was playing a part in helping the world changers of today to find their voice.

And let me tell you – when they decide to use it, the world won’t be the same!

The X Factor lessons for youth mentoring

The home of professional youth mentoring

 

Mentoring frameworks vary so much that it's often difficult to pin down ‘how’ mentoring should be done and how mentoring programmes ‘should’ be designed.

Surprisingly the X-Factor TV show has a few pointers on mentoring best practices that we can all learn from.

 

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How our Founders' career in youth mentoring began

In this episode of the 16 part Opogo vlog series, our Founder and Ceo her educational background in social policy and how her career in youth mentoring started.

 

If you would like to find out more about our youth mentoring training or how we can support a young person you know, contact us today.